True Colors

Being true to oneself is always going to be a challenge. Being true to what God has called you, nearly impossible without His help.

Living in so many different areas has been a good experience for me. I grew up in Seattle, moved to Utah when I was twelve, attended college in Missouri, and ministered alongside my husband for five years in Wisconsin, moving to again over a year ago to the East Coast. In each place, I had to decide all over again who I wanted to be. Because, as my dad put it, "When you move, you have the opportunity to become someone different."

I have listened to Dad's words. There are some parts of my character I have improved upon (with much help from God and His trials) and don't worry about unpacking it at my new home. I am more patient and gentler than a few years ago. I keep a cleaner home, and am writing more and focusing on what is important better than I have before.

And there are those times I knew were inevitable that slip out and uncover my "human-ess" and flaws. Then I have to dig through my boxes I thought could be taped shut awhile longer and humble myself, apologize, and restore the relationship (hopefully, making it stronger than it was before). Maybe it's the same feeling you get at an airport when your suitcase falls open and granny-panties fall out. Not that this has ever happened to me.

Maybe starting over in a new place is good on one hand, but on the other hand, people have to get to know me all over again. And it's never a great experience when I see and feel that realization in people that I am not perfect. Aww, but it was nice while it lasted.

The one good thing that comes from someone getting to know you is they realize that you have struggles, too. And that leads to better moments of ministry and healing. This is what a Christian life should be; open, honest and willing to be real. God can use "real" better than He can "perfect."